It’s been a very interesting year so far and it’s not even halfway through. I’ve learnt more about myself and my relationships in the last 4 and a half months than I have in many years put together.
At times, I wonder if age has something to do with it or if it’s experience. Other times, I believe in just going with the flow and not analysing things too much. Clearly, this post isn’t one of those times.
2019 began as the year of ‘depth’ for me. And I am not sure if it has something to do with attracting what you believe or if the universe actually conspires to make things happen, but everything that has happened this year has worked towards that feeling of ‘depth.’
Let’s take reading as an example. I have taken up and vowed to finish 50 books for this year’s Goodreads Challenge. Why? I honestly don’t know. At some level, I wanted to get back to reading for its own sake and for the joy it gave me. At another level, I suppose I wanted to set a quantifiable goal and see it through.
Well, you’d be interested to know that I am 10 books behind schedule. But here’s the best part: I am NOT worried. And it’s crazy because I was SUCH an over-achiever that if I didn’t get that ability to cross it off my list, I’d have gone bonkers.
Instead, I did precisely what my word for the year intended: read each of the 7 books in 2019 (so far) with immense depth. The last time I took this long to read 7 books was. . . never! I was known for zipping through 3 books a week. You’d think I absorbed nothing, but actually the opposite is true. I had the memory and grasping power of an elephant and could recall complete passages from books without blinking an eye.
That was then. This is now.
I took over a month to finish the latest book ‘Atomic Habits’ by James Clear.
And I took that much time because I didn’t want to zip through the book. Does that sound crazy? I mean, I love page-turners as much as the next person but some books don’t lend themselves to that.
In fact, I even tried reading another book to keep me company while I was reading this one, but nope. I found myself coming back again to finish this one first. Is that what a calling feels like?
With age (and possibly more distractions than are good for the soul), I have come back to enjoy the time I have to read. Here’s something else you can put on record about me: I HATE Multitasking.
I cannot read/blog/social media hop/socialise with family all at once. It’s impossible. More than that, I’ve lost the taste for being everywhere at once. It gives you a nice heady rush, I agree. But it takes away from the pleasure of living in the moment.
Slowly. Deeply. Gratefully.
With a few more weeks left before I get back from my vacation, I am savouring these moments of quietude and reflection. In doing so, it is my fervent wish that I carry back that reflection to be an integral part of my existence and work, even when I resume my routine.
For, if we learn nothing from our time off, what is the value of a vacation?