It’s a comfortable place to be- this space under the white sheets. I’m sure you know what I mean. A part of you wakes up, fresh, energised, ready to greet the day and you take a leap into the embrace that awaits.
It’s an invigorating moment: that first minute when you realise that everything is possible, anything is worth achieving and that the whole world will conspire to get you that which your heart desires.

Of late though, those moments are dwindling. All that pent-up energy, the moments of fragmentary explosions of joy seem to evaporate into the ether when something else strikes. It’s quiet, persistent and insidious- this poison and there’s nothing much one can do about it.
It’s just four letters long and you’d be astonished when you realise the vice-like grip it has on everything you do and anything you feel. All your enthusiasm seems powerless against its stony glare and you crumple like one of the many of Medusa’s victims.
Your list of things to do, people to meet, moments to share, seconds to savour withers away into cold nothingness when confronted by this monster.
So you do the next best thing: crawl back under the sheets and hope against hope that this will pass. It does. For a few minutes.
But when you lift the covers again, there it stands, staring you in the face. Unblinkingly.
You sigh, throw the covers off and drag yourself off the bed and look it in the eye. And you say: ‘Okay, Life. Give me your best shot. Let’s do this. Today.’
Life takes up the challenge and sucker-punches you in the gut. You double up, clutch your solar plexus, reel, but stand up again.
Your opponent grins, bows and withdraws.Just so that you can come out from under the covers.
One more time.


 *A free write exercise that just had to see the light of day on the blog. Published this as a note on my Facebook page this evening.
**There will be no Soulful Sundays this weekend.

8 thoughts on “Under the covers

  1. Yeah Shailaja – getting out of bed is the hardest task of all – when I’m lying under the covers giving myself just a few more moments of peace before I jump into the daily grind. It’s so tempting to just stay there. But once you can stand up to your ‘opponent’ it’s a good start to a good day.

  2. Well written Shailaja. Depression eats away at the core of so many people and it’s almost as if dementors have sucked the joy out of them. When they finally are able to free themselves, they are so different.

  3. Amen to that. Early to bed has helped me a lot. I used to be a night owl too. I do like getting up early and realising I have a whole 2 hours to do what I want.

  4. Thank you, Sid. Pushing back is what I am getting better at. Too much of lying down and taking it: let’s just say I have had enough. Thanks for reading.

  5. I agree with you completely. I am like that, most of the time. Some days though you just want to sock life on the chin and get on with it. I try not to hide under the covers, to be honest. That means life has defeated me and I cannot have that!

  6. Oh yes, I feel like that every day. Every single day. But once I am out of bed, mornings are my favorite time of the day. This is a recent development, as I used to be a total night owl. I guess I am just growing old, but I need my rest now. 😛

  7. Life does do that a lot. I guess, we just need to keep pushing back 🙂 After all, without obstacles, our achievements wouldn’t count as much, would they?
    Interesting free write exercise, Shailaja

  8. Very well done post! When I wake up I am out of bed – every time. The more difficult my life may be at the time, the faster I want to get busy in the morning so I don’t have time to “think” and get depressed. But, we are all different and for some, I am sure the safety of hiding under the covers is what helps them.

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